Laszlo is the finest mind of his generation, and a part time S.H.I.E.L.D. scientist. He invented coffee machines, microwaves, and nuclear powered cars and has won a Grammy, a Kid's Choice award, and a Nobel Peace Prize. 


Early Life Edit

Laszlo was born and raised in Kentucky, by two raccoons in a dumpster. He learned how to split atoms from his two parents, who he killed after he learned all their knowledge to prevent competition. 

Becoming a Legend Edit

When he was 21, he was smacked in the ass by a giant hotdog who wished to eat the planet. He then invented a jail cell for the hotdog with unobtanium, before sending it to the sun with his sheer left toe. This drew the attention of Nick Fury, who hired him to make machines that magically generate hot pockets and poptarts for S.H.I.E.L.D. agents.  

Death Edit

He later died when brutally attacked and torn limb from limb by antlions. 

Appearances Edit

  • Half-Life 2 (First appearance) (cameo only)
  • Sense of Right Alliance (Mentioned only)